True or false?
Kids, romance and holidays don’t mix. Who said!? Many of you would answer “true” that trying to
have any sort of intimacy or romance with your partner is an almost impossible feat
when you have kids. Well, I would have agreed
with you a few years ago. What has
changed is I was exposed to the secrets to enjoying a holiday with the kids and
enjoying intimacy and time with my partner.
You have gotta love that.
My take is that connecting with your partner is a combination of
environment, mindset and yes there is a bit of planning. I would love to share with you some of the
practical tips on how to you can have LOVE, INTIMACY and maybe a little bit of
ROMANCE too!
1. Find
a holiday destination that is both accommodating to adults and children. Places
with kids clubs, special activities, playgrounds, pools etc. where the kids can
be entertained will go a long way in laying the groundwork for some “alone
time.”
2. Take
your parents, the in-laws or holiday with friends. You might gawk at the idea
of taking your parents or in-laws on holidays with you – but think about how
much alone time you will get – dinners, breakfasts, afternoon walks along the
beach… of course you can still do things as a family and separately. Another
idea is to arrange a holiday with another family or group of families where you
can look after each other’s kids while having time alone with your partner.
3. Plan
a holiday schedule. Depending on how old your kids are, have a look at the kids
club or activities planned. Craft or movie afternoons will enable you to have a
couple hours here and there together. The key is to plan!
4. Put
some distance between you and the children. For example, you might let them
splash in the shallow end of the pool or kid’s area while you sit on some
lounges a little distance away (but still able to supervise). Likewise set them
up on the beach with their buckets and spades and let them build away while you
lay in the sun a few metres away. These little snippets of time will allow you
to spend time together, have decent conversations, hold hands and enjoy each
other.
5. Pick
a lights out/curfew time that allows alone time together for at least 2 hours
every night. If your kids are older tell them they have to go to their rooms at
8pm for reading, computer or iPod time. This will allow you time together to
catch a movie or have some intimate moments.
6. Hug
Daily. Regular embraces can lower the
risk of heart disease, combat stress and fatigue, boost the immune system,
fight infections and ease depression.
Research is increasingly showing that the effects of hugging can lower
blood pressure and afterwards increases the levels of feel-good hormones such
as oxytocian and the stress chemicals of cortisol drop. So hugs whenever you can.
7. Plan
a date night. Organise for family who
are staying with you to look after the kids or if you are holidaying alone,
organise a babysitter with the Front Reception.
2 hours dinner, a few wines and great conversation is an awesome holiday
connection. If you plan the time right,
the kids will be in bed when you get home and then its time alone for a cuppa
and.................................................. ;)
So once you’ve mastered stealing some “alone” time here and
there what do you do? Well of course you can have some cheeky holiday moments
but intimacy doesn’t necessarily mean having sex. It can be grabbing a quiet
coffee together, sharing a bottle of wine on the balcony, holding hands while
walking along the beach, watching a movie, having a nice massage or foot rub,
snuggle on the lounge, putting on some nice music and light some candles, share
a shower or bath together, share a box of chocolates, have a nice dinner without
the kids (maybe wait until after they have gone to bed).
Think creatively and enjoy each other!
